Isn’t it satisfying to know that we do not have to feel sorry anymore for the poor martyr that is Katie Holmes? Recent information has come to light that proves the entire Tomkat drama of the past week actually has an entire plan behind it, much like a manipulative school girl who wants to play the “pregnancy” card in order to marry her boyfriend who was cursed with the unfortunate name of Gollum.
Katie Holmes will present her label at New York Fashion Week. Yes, you read that right. The destroyed poor ingénue, who suffers from a case of the Scientology paranoia, is indeed planning to have her debut presentation for Holmes and Yang in September. Katie founded the line with her design partner Jeanne Yang in 2009. It is an exclusive and ready-to-wear-line, currently only stocked in high-end exclusive boutiques. Katie recently said, “We love Ingrid Bergman, Katherine Hepburn, Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly. So we went back and said, ‘What was it about those pieces that made them memorable?’ ‘Was it the highlighted slim waist, or the shape of the skirt?’ And when you go back you understand you were looking at the woman, not the clothes.”
Please correct us if we’re wrong, but a woman going through one of the most traumatic experiences of her life, fighting to stay afloat and to keep Suri out of the hands of the Scientologists, will not be traipsing around New York Fashion week like a Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. This just screams manipulation to us, seeing that Tom Cruise’s blindsiding divorce application and the “coincidental” coinciding of a fashion show only begins to explain the publicity obsession this gal has. It gave us an unsettling feeling in our stomach, much like that time when you munched down on Aunt Mildred’s sandwiches and realized it was not beef, but horse.
Eureka moments do not come with a glowing light bulb above your head. An epiphany is actually quite a very calming experience. We had this epiphany recently when we looked at all of the facts from both sides of the story. We weighed them up and came to the terrible realization that Katie Holmes is indeed, a bit of a publicity junkie. Google the facts, read about both sides of the story, eat Cheerios, cry in the bathtub, join a nudist colony and look at Tom Cruise’s I-cut-up-dead-bodies smile. Everything points to Katie being not as innocent as she is trying to proclaim.
A fashion show when your life is crumbling? That’s like entering a reality show if you were born without a personality. Come on Katie! Stop making fools of all of us. We see that you actually used this entire divorce drama to publicize your failed career and fashion line.
What do you think readers? Is this fashion show just too good to be true? Is Katie partly to blame for the divorce? Let us know in the comments below.
Oh, and Tom? Please be so kind as to remove the tied-up ex-Scientologists from your dungeon?
