The latest cover of OK! Magazine is graced by the prancing –and borderline idiotic – faces of Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. A gold coloured sticker pops out of Stewart’s perfect coif, and reads, “Big News!” What is this big news we hear you ask? Well, according to OK!, Stewart and Pattinson are expecting a fat little pink foot. The tagline reads, “Robert & Kristen: Yes, we’re having a baby!” The bullet points outlined below the yellow and white tagline read, “The joyful moment Kristen found out, they’ll raise the baby in England,” and “Inside their lavish nursery.” And last, but not least, “Kristen begs Rob: Marry Me!”
Dear Godiva… Say goodbye to your life, because the world will never be the same again with a Twilight baby. Could this be the reason Pattinson and Stewart reconciled so quickly? Could these “baby rumours” actually be factual? Could the most scarred couple in Hollywood history be bringing a little person into their dysfunctional lives? The cheating fame whore could be a mother, so grab your children and hold onto them for dear life, America!
Unfortunately, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie only received a sideline on this week’s cover. Allegedly, there’s drama cookies being baked in the land of Brangelina, as their tagline reads, “Weight-loss drama,” followed by, “Angie puts Brad on a diet.” Well, we don’t blame her. Brad isn’t a young actor with a chiseled abdomen in Thelma and Louise anymore, he has, after all, already lived a life of fame. The Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber tragedy is just below that, with the tagline, “Justin and Selena: It’s getting nasty!” Yes, we know it’s getting nasty, because certain gossipmongers are still milking this juicy gossip cow for all it’s worth! These kids should be sent on their merry way and left alone, because they are, after all, back together and whatnot. Finally, in the bottom right corner we have an irrelevant Teen Mom tagline that no one even cares about.
Will this cover of OK! Magazine send shockwaves through Hollywood? What will a pregnancy scandal do to the already tarnished careers of Pattinson and Stewart? Why won’t he marry her? What did she do this time? For more celebrity scandals and more details on the recent Twilight baby rumours, pop around to your nearest store and pick up a copy of OK! Magazine. Remember, OK! is the only magazine with the real story, just like Celeb Dirty Laundry!
Image Credit: OK!