Michael Buble is the quintessential throwback crooner. He released his debut album in 2003 to worldwide critical appeal. The Buble popped and he went from a young Canadian throwback singer to a worldwide superstar. He has traveled all around the world with his concerts and has amassed a smattering of female fans. His albums have also been the background music to billions of annual weddings.
Buble was engaged to long time girlfriend Debbie Timuss, but that soon ended when fame dug its fiendish claws into Buble’s perfectly waxed back. He met and dated actress Emily Blunt for a while, but broke up with her in 2008. He most probably didn’t know that she was literally blunt…
Enter Buble’s new babe – an Argentinean actress and model who has been Buble’s brand new arm candy. Her name is Luisana Lopilato and at the risk of making her sound like a sweaty lollipop in a Louisiana chicken bucket, we shall refrain from making jokes about her name. It is open season on Buble though.
Lopilato’s latest modeling images for the swimwear/lingerie Ultimo line has many men dunking their hands in fires to stop them from downloading the images. She poses provocatively in lingerie, with blonde hair falling down her shoulders like manna at a Greek god kiddy party.
I knew a girl at high school who almost exactly resembled Lopalito. A Valentine’s Day card was handed to her by a minion in a lower grade, in the hope that she appreciated the cold meat cutlet I carved into the shape of a heart for her. Needless to say, my name changed from “Fatsy Bone Butt” to “Meat Pimple” and the town blamed the recent cold cuts disappearances on me. They found the cold cut culprit a few months later – it turned out to be a vegan with Kleptomania.
Buble (Bubble? Boobly? Booblay?) is happy. He has a hot model for a girlfriend and he is the cause for numerous baby booms all across the world. If only they stopped playing his music in China…
Let us know in the comments below what you think.
