Robert Pattinson’s Secret Sexual Act Undercover Identity

Robert Pattinson's Secret Sexual Act Undercover Identity

Robert Pattinson is generally known as the sparkly Edward Cullen from the Twilight saga. His adoring fans love him for his rugged look, his quirky smile, and his Bri’ish accent, but many Twihards do not realize that their favourite vampire disguises himself when he stays at hotels by using sexually themed monikers. According to Hope at Celebs Gather, “In an effort to ditch the crowds of hysterical females inevitably waiting outside his hotel rooms wherever he goes in the world, Rob tries to disguise himself – both physically and on paper. For the physical transformation, he dons disguises that are, alas, cumbersome and ineffective. In fact, the usually have the opposite effect.

According to Pattinson, “I’m just getting more and more conspicuous. I’m wearing two hoods, a hat and sunglasses, which kind of stands out in the middle of the night. So I’m learning to spring.”  Looking like Eric Roberts on heat is not the only problem Pattinson needs to contend with when he is running from fans all over the world; his oddly named aliases also pose a problem for the super film star. During a recent trip to Paris, France, Pattinson used the alias of erm… Well, we’ll let the man speak for himself, “I was Clive Handjob in Paris. Everyone in the hotel called me ‘Monsieur Handjob’. That was good, cheap fun.

He was attempting to be as inconspicuous as possible? Right?  “Monsieur Handjob, would you like some cockatoo with your asparagus?” Side Note: Alice Clayton, the author of Wallbanger (don’t laugh!) named the infamous cat in the novel, Clive, after Pattinson’s “Clive Handjob” character. The protagonist in the novel, Caroline Roberts, lives in a great San Francisco apartment, and “[she] has a flourishing design career, an office overlooking the bay, a killer zucchini bread recipe, and no O.” Yes, you read right, no O.

We guess Kristen Stewart – the other woman with no O – absolutely loved her man’s alias. In fact, we think Stewart most probably chose it for him, because what’s fame whoring showmancers without a Clive Handjob or two? What do you think about Pattinson’s alias? Do you think it’s been done to death – you know, the sex jokes? Or do you think he sounds cool as Clive Handjob? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet



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