Octomom Nadya Suleman was evicted from her home after she spent more money than a manic millionaire. Now that Octo has conquered the pornography industry with her inspirational self-pleasure work, she is set to release her dance single. Sorry, what was that? We can’t hear you over the sound of music industry executives turning into raging alcoholics.
Global Groove Entertainment signed the mother of 14 children to a music contract. Her first single will be named “Get on the Dance Floor”. The sound of club DJ’s ripping off their ears can be heard over the auto-tuned beat. We went to Global Groove Entertainment’s website and found pictures of girls who look like they belong in a lost lingerie catalogue in a seedy bathroom off the highway, singing songs such as “Goodbye Kiss”, “Count on Me” and the soon to be seminal classic, “Do It Again (Remixes)”.
The track will be released on August the 1st and the world will end on August the 2nd.
“Dear Mayan, we are sorry we doubted your prophecy of worldwide destruction and tears. We’ll never doubt you again, now please make this go away?”
Octomom will be singing and rapping on the single. We attempted to find the lyrics on the Internet, but Google broke down when we searched for it, so sorry about that!
We would personally like to thank Octomom for the Apocalypse and extend her an invitation to our end of the world party to be held at the gates of Hell. Kim Kardashian and Lindsay Lohan are also invited. Please RSVP before the end of the week, because planning your own destruction takes a while.
Will you be downloading Octomom’s single? Will you cry in a bathtub? Will you attempt to listen to Justin Bieber to make it all go away?
Let us know in the comments below.
Credit: BJJ/FameFlynet Pictures