A simple examination of the life of Bristol Palin shows her to be a deceitful fool with the arrogance of a lion – imagine doing a speaking tour trumpeting sexual abstinence when you were an underage and unwed mother currently involved in another relationship? Nobody but Bristol Palin would even dare!
Another example of her hubris can be found near the end of her memoir where Bristol Palin declares that her love story with Levi Johnston is “not unique” and places it in historical perspective for the reader. “Women throughout history have looked back at their relationships and wondered how they could’ve loved a man who treated them so badly,” she writes. “From Hillary Clinton to Sandra Bullock, from Jackie Kennedy to Jennifer Aniston, from Elin Woods to Princess Diana.”
Imagine the gall of Bristol Palin placing herself in a group of supposedly scorned women that includes the secretary of state and Jackie Kennedy!!! I mean Bristol wouldn’t have even qualified to be a Monica Lewinsky, let alone a Hillary. Bristol was wild girl who screwed around with a boy and got impregnated and then dumped – this hardly makes her a tragic figure – just a skank.
At the age of 20, with all the wisdom of her experience to draw upon (LOL), Palin has written a memoir about the ordeal of being Johnston’s partner, a teenage mother to their child and a contestant on “Dancing With the Stars.”
Johnston is called a “gnat” and a “big guy who had a talent for trash-talking but nothing else.” He’s “inarticulate,” “cocky” and “obnoxious.” He’s the bully who pulls hair, trips people and “put Ex-Lax in some kid’s brownie.” He lies to her all the time — about other girls, about having bought a new truck even though he was broke, about reeling in “12 fish when he didn’t catch any” and assorted other misdeeds.
“Like many women throughout history, I went for the ‘bad boy’ who didn’t care about authority,” she says. “Levi’s bad behavior wasn’t a deal-breaker for me.” They had an on-again, off-again relationship from the moment they met in seventh grade that, according to Palin, was always being tested by his romps with other girls and her family’s disapproval of him.
She begins the book with their lowest moment together, promising that “No one has ever heard this part of my story” and that what we’re about to read “would affect my life in ways a teenager could not comprehend.”
One summer night in high school, Palin lies to her mom, saying she’s spending the night at her friend’s house. Instead, she goes camping with Johnston and some friends. She writes that she had never taken a sip of alcohol before the camping trip — “I knew nothing about anything bad really . . . especially the differences between vodka, beer, and whiskey” — but as she sits by the fire, she finds herself enjoying the way the wine coolers Johnston is plying her with make her feel “young and carefree.” The next thing Palin remembers is waking up in his tent with his empty sleeping bag by her side.
How do you spell BULLSHIT?
“What I don’t remember is what transpired between the moment when I was sitting there by the fire talking and the moment I awakened the next morning,” she writes. She goes on: “Suddenly, I wondered why it was called ‘losing your virginity,’ because it felt more like it had been stolen.”
‘Squandered’ would be a better word Bristol.
Image credit to FayesVision/WENN.com