Robert Pattinson Loves Dating Normal Riley Keough, Compares Kristen Stewart To ‘Bennifer’

Robert Pattinson Loves Dating Normal Riley Keough, Compares Kristen Stewart To 'Bennifer' 0703

Oh no, he just god damn didn’t. He did not just compare Kristen Stewart to Jennifer Lopez. JLo dates back-up dancers fifteen years too young for her. She writhes around stage in crotch-hugging ensembles. She walks red carpets like she’s the only one there and we should be thanking her for her time. I can’t imagine anymore more unlike Kristen Stewart in every way. But apparently we don’t know her like Robert Pattinson does.

Let me preface this whole post by saying this source is coming from Hollywood Life so it is most definitely, probably not true in the slightest. HOWEVER, it’s not everyday you get a Kristen Stewart/Jennifer Lopez comparison so we should roll with it and enjoy it while we can. Basically the gist is that Rob’s uber happy dating Riley Keough because she’s totally grounded and normal and not into the whole celebrity thing. Kristen turned their relationship into a show akin to Ben Affleck and JLo. Really? Rob and Kristen Stewart? Bennifer? I don’t know about you but I never saw Rob’s hand massage Kristen’s ass on a yacht. I thought she was pretty adverse to him touching her in public at all.

And Rob’s pretty psyched that Riley can go into a store and no one freaks out over her like they would Kristen. Well, that’s sure to change awfully fast. So, he wanted some peace and quiet. Fine. I get that. But how naive is this kid to think he’s going to get that by dating the granddaughter of king of rock and roll? All I can do is shake my head at the stupidity.

But, like I said, considering the source, this is all probably nonsense. But it was fun, wasn’t it? I’m not sure what was more entertaining – Rob’s delusions or picturing Kristen Stewart on Puffy’s arm in that nasty green Versace dress. Puffy for sure!


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4 responses to “Robert Pattinson Loves Dating Normal Riley Keough, Compares Kristen Stewart To ‘Bennifer’”

  1. […] • Rob Pattinson compares his ex girlfriend, Kristen Stewart, to Bennifer which is a wonderful way to say that you’re annoyed by someone. (Celeb Dirty Laundry) […]

  2. carrie says:

    Riley’s publicist said to Daily Mail and other gossip blogs that she’s not dating Pattinson

  3. […] with Rob over the weekend, and she hasn’t been dating him – despite all the reports that state otherwise. I get it though – she’s probably getting harassed by the Twi-hards, who are probably going […]

  4. […] weeks ago so now they’re dating! Kristen Stewart sure works fast doesn’t she? Not as fast as Robert Pattinson though so maybe this rebound story has more to do with a little payback than it does of Kristen […]